SHREVEPORT, LA – Without the slightest sense of irony or any apparent awareness of the definition of hypocrisy, Chris Benton of Shreveport has grown remarkably comfortable using his Facebook account to browbeat and berate fellow Christians who, for whatever reason, refuse to completely boycott any and all giant anti-Christian policy advocating corporations not named Facebook.
“How can someone credibly claim to be a Christian while using the bathroom at Target?” asked Benton rhetorically in his typically inquisitorial tone in a post shared just last night to wrap up a long day of berating brothers and sisters in Christ for their shopping and bathroom habits. “Answer: They can’t!”
“And how can anyone professing a love for Christ with their tongue expect that profession of faith to be taken seriously when they willfully expose that very same tongue to a hot, delicious Pike’s Place Roast from Starbucks?”
“Their Christian cred is shredded a little more with each sip they take, and we all know it.”
“And don’t even get me started on Apple…”
Benton’s persistent rage at Target, Apple, Wal-Mart, AT&T, Verizon, Google, Microsoft, Coca-Cola, Pepsi, and practically every major corporation you can think of besides Facebook, has been the defining theme of his social media presence since he first began to view it as a path to perceived spiritual superiority sometime in the winter of 2009. Since then, he hasn’t looked back…or stopped to think about exactly how Facebook is, or isn’t, really any different than any of the other giant companies he rails against.
“Professing believers who refuse to boycott Target, Apple, and Starbucks have to ask themselves: Am I even really a Christian?” mused Benton via Facebook rant early this morning while ramping up for another long weekend of attacking anyone who uses an iPhone or bought a Twinkie at Target last week. “These people need to be challenged. They need to be encouraged to consider the questions that are begging to be asked with each passing use of a product or service provided by a God-hating corporation.”
“Questions like: ‘Am I really saved?’ and ‘Do I really even understand the Gospel?'”
You can also get a detailed look into what we’re doing and why we’re doing it by reading Mocking The Prophets Of Baal: The Beauty And Power Of Christian Satire (And Why So Many People Hate It) over at FireBreathingChristian.com.