SEATTLE, WA – A leading Puget Sound advocate for the LGBTQRSTD movement finally achieved full liberation from reality after self-identifying as a bird and plunging to his death from atop the Space Needle.
With preparations ramping up for Seattle’s annual Gay Pride celebrations, LGBTQRSTD leader Angel Jones was attending the traditional gay pride flag unfurling event on the upper deck of the Space Needle when he was overwhelmed by what he described aloud as “an undeniable sense of freedom and liberty” just before claiming to be “a bird man” and hurling himself over the observation deck guard rail and into the sky.
From there he immediately plunged to his death while flapping his arms like wings and making increasingly terrified bird-like noises all the way down.
“He finally came out as the bird man he really was inside,” noted fellow Pride advocate Shirley Spacey while wiping a tear from his/her eye. “It was just so beautiful to see him create his own reality for that split second before gravity kicked in.”
“But he’s free of gravity now – free of gravity and all the other stupid, unfair rules that hold us down and keep us from being whatever we want to be.”
“Angel’s terminal, tragi-comedic plunge to his own death is what Pride is all about.”
“May he be an example to us all.”
You can also get a detailed look into what we’re doing and why we’re doing it by reading Mocking The Prophets Of Baal: The Beauty And Power Of Christian Satire (And Why So Many People Hate It) over at FireBreathingChristian.com.