DETROIT, ROCK CITY – Gene Simmons, the famed bass playing, blood spitting, fire breathing, kabuki makeup wearing member of the rock band Kiss, is “seriously considering” a run for the White House in 2020 or 2024 according to sources close to the aging rock icon.
In the wake of Donald Trump’s ascendancy to the presidency, Simmons is said to have become “obsessed” by the possibility of a Kiss-themed presidency.
“Can you just imagine Trump handing the nation – or what’s left of it, anyway – off to The Demon from Kiss in 2020 or 2024?” asked Rolling Stone in a recent editorial. “What would a Gene Simmons inauguration look like? Would he be in full make-up? Would he swear an oath on the Bible? Would the Bible then burst into flames? Would America then burst into flames?”
“As unbelievable and bizarre as all of this might seem, none of it can be ruled out.”
“After all, if The Demon ran as a Republican against a Clinton or an Obama, you just know he’d get most of the evangelical vote.”
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