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North Korea Accidentally Nukes Itself

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NorthKoreaNukesItself

PYONGYANG – In yet another profoundly misguided and tragically comedic effort to impress the world with its military prowess, North Korea has accidentally nuked itself.

According to numerous reports from the region, embarrassment caused by the failure of an earlier missile test launch conducted even as multiple US carrier fleets converged on the Korean peninsula inspired the Korean People’s Army to hastily launch another test early this morning.

“We will not tolerate the insolence and laughter of our enemies,” explained an early morning pre-test press release from North Korea’s Department of People’s Propaganda and Posturing. “The world will soon learn to fear the destructive power of the Democratic People’s Republic of North Korea!”

The subsequent test of yet another Pukguksong-2 medium-range ballistic missile, which was “accidentally equipped” with a  nuclear warhead, saw the missile sputter off its launchpad only to almost instantly careen directly into a suburb of Pyongyang. North Korean officials immediately blamed Donald Trump for somehow “hacking” the missile launch.

Trump Administration officials responded off the record by shrugging, rolling their eyes, and mentioning something about how “somebody oughta de-nuke those guys before they accidentally blow up the whole region”.


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