WASHINGTON, DC – With campaign promise after campaign promise falling by the wayside, and the LGBTQ agenda continuing to roll over the culture alongside massive Socialist systems like public schools, Social Security, and Obamacare, more and more Christian Trump supporters are beginning to feel a lot like his second ex-wife.
“Obviously, heading into the campaign last year, we had crystal clarity regarding Donald’s self-serving character, self-centered pride, and complete contempt for standards that get in the way of what he wants at any given moment,” explained Missy Donaldson, 34, of Atlanta, while addressing the Women for Trump group that meets at her church on weekends. “It’s not as though there was any doubt about the man’s utter inability to live within anything remotely resembling the most basic standards of fidelity and decency. I mean, we all knew that he traded in wives regularly and that he made much of his fortune peddling vice. So yeah, it’s hard not to feel more and more like Marla Maples as things unfold.”
“She had no excuses, and neither do we.”
When asked if she was now advising her Christian friends to repent of having abandoned all biblical principles in support of Trump simply because he was not running as a Democrat, Donaldson explained, “Oh no! No way!”
“We’re not about to do that!”
“We’re committed to making America great again, and if our playing the role of Donald’s used-up, walked-over, betrayed, and abandoned ex-wives is what it takes to accomplish that, then we’re proud to stand with our man and do our part to make that happen!”
You can also get a detailed look into what we’re doing and why we’re doing it by reading Mocking The Prophets Of Baal: The Beauty And Power Of Christian Satire (And Why So Many People Hate It) over at FireBreathingChristian.com.