Elderly Rock Star Mistaken for Zombie Prop In ‘Dawn of the Dead’ Reboot

End Times Staff

5/6/2016

HOLLYWOOD, CA – According to numerous eye witness reports, Mick Jagger was recently mistaken for a zombie prop while wandering near a production lot where a Dawn of the Dead reboot was being shot.

The legendary septuagenarian and great grandfather frontman of the increasingly undead-ish Rolling Stones was visiting Paramount Studios when he apparently stood a little too still for a little too long while listening to some voicemails through a well concealed Bluetooth earpiece as two stage hands attempted to load him onto a dolly and wheel him towards a set.

“We had him all loaded up and ready to roll when he jumped up and started to do some sort of weird old person dance,” reported Paramount stage hand Zack Rhodes. “It was the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Jimmy Lang, Rhodes’ coworker and the Paramount worker who actually lifted Jagger’s zombie-like frame up and onto the dolly, is said to still be shaken by the incident.

“He was so still for so long and looked so dead. I never in a million would have thought he was alive,” recalled Lang. “And when he finally did jump off the dolly, he hopped and danced around so much that I was sure he was gonna break something. Like maybe a hip.”

“Then he stopped dancing, took a bow and just sort of wandered off mumbling something about how he should have smoked less, drank less, and maybe not made that deal with the devil.”