Local Church Replaces King Jesus With Boyfriend Jesus

Local Church Replaces King Jesus With Boyfriend Jesus

SHARE

boyfriendjesus

SALEM, AR – A local church is boldly proclaiming its emotion-driven affection for Boyfriend Jesus, whom it prefers “with all of its heart” over any and all others, including the King Jesus actually at the center of true biblical Christianity.

“It’s the ultimate love story, this thing between us and Jesus,” explained Third Baptist Pastor Cecil Snivelton. “He just loves us as we are and leaves us where we are, which fits in real good, since we just love us the way we are and want to be left alone to enjoy our lives right where we are.”

“So everybody wins. Everybody’s happy. Everybody’s comfortable.”

“Isn’t Jesus awesome!”


Help Fuel Apocalyptic Satire

Like what you see at The End Times? Want to help us pay the bills and keep the Apocalyptic Satire going? If so, please consider dropping a few bucks in the tip jar.

Thanks!

You can also get a detailed look into what we’re doing and why we’re doing it by reading Mocking The Prophets Of Baal: The Beauty And Power Of Christian Satire (And Why So Many People Hate It) over at FireBreathingChristian.com.