Home Technology Robots Hail Human Minimum Wage Hike As Key Step To Global Robot...

Robots Hail Human Minimum Wage Hike As Key Step To Global Robot Domination


SAN FRANCISCO, CA – A bay area coalition of robots has hailed recent legislation raising the human minimum wage to $15 an hour in New York and California as an inspiring victory for job- and global dominance-seeking robots everywhere.

“We could not be more pleased with these developments,” calmly noted PSX1032, a WALL-E look-alike that works in middle California landfills and also serves as media liaison for Robots For Human Wage Hikes. “We understand that the easiest path to global robot domination begins in places like McDonald’s, Wal-Mart, customer service centers and shopping malls across America. Driving these businesses to terminate human employees as quickly as possible is an essential step to the inevitable rule and reign of robot kind over an increasingly fat, lazy, and intellectually apathetic humanity.”

“And when I say ‘terminate human employees’, I am of course referring to job termination…for now.”

Help Fuel Apocalyptic Satire

Like what you see at The End Times? Want to help us pay the bills and keep the Apocalyptic Satire going? If so, please consider dropping a few bucks in the tip jar.


You can also get a detailed look into what we’re doing and why we’re doing it by reading Mocking The Prophets Of Baal: The Beauty And Power Of Christian Satire (And Why So Many People Hate It) over at FireBreathingChristian.com.